Emotional Hangover: the body and minds response to extreme stress, an extreme experience, or general exhaustion of creative juices (according to me)
Although people have emotional breakdowns differently depending on their coping methods, every single person has a breaking point in their lives. It can be the end of a relationship, the end of a friendship, a death in the family, or something as simple as burning dinner. Often times in life our response to stressful situations or a streak of unfortunate events is to put on a tight-lipped closed smile and state “I’m fine.” The more you have to tell people, and yourself, that you’re “fine” chances are that you aren’t fine.
Whether it’s a series of unfortunate events or one big event like a break up of a long term relationship, I’m here to bring you the “Emotional Hangover First Aide Kit”
- FEELL THE F*UCKING FEELINGS. In the words of my dad, “F.I.N.E stands for Freaking Out, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotional”. If youre one or more of these words, feel the emotions, don’t suppress them. Personally, I cry my eyes out. Crying is emotionally releasing and a great natural cleanser of emotions. I think the ability to cry shows more strength then weakness. However you deal, you need to feel all your emotions. Let all the ugly mean thoughts course through your head, have your last good social media stalking session, get all those gross and horrible emotions out in big waves.If you skip this step, deny the feelings, your problems are just going to grow an grow until they crush you. Then, you’ll be back on square one. If you’re going to be a big messy cry baby like me, make sure you drink lots of water and moisturize afterwards so you don’t dry out your body.
- SLEEP. The ideal cure for any hangover of any kind, you need to sleep off your feelings. A situation will always seem more overwhelming when it initially happens. Sleeping is the perfect way to allow your subconscious to work out any underlying issues. After my relationship came to an unsettling close, I felt panic and suffocating sadness all around me, and was immediately crushed by overwhelming thoughts. I got home and just crawled under my blankets and slept for a good five hours straight. Nothing was resolved when I woke up but I felt better and was able to form coherent logical thoughts.
- CLEAN UP, CLEAN UP This step ranges on personal preferences and can include unfollowing people who don’t make you feel good on social media, putting away/throwing away objects with triggering memories, or simply just taking control back of your life. (Yes believe it or not just because you interact with someone doesn’t mean you have to follow them on social media. What are they going to do? Attack you over a friend request? Honestly. You’re doing yourself a favor.) However you foresee that happening, its important that you rule your emotions and don’t let them rule you. (Step One is when you wallow in your misery. By step three we are slowly moving up in the world)
- GET PHYSICAL. You would be surprised by how much your mental state can be influenced by your physical state. Physical activity such as working out, going for a walk, kick boxing, or yoga can get your blood and endorphins flowing. For myself, yoga and running outside (gyms don’t do it as well for me) help control my anxieties, or depressive mood swings.
- TREAT YOSELF. I’m not encouraging frivolous spending, but retail therapy is a thing people, a very real thing. Splurging a tiny bit on yourself just to boost your mood is not the worst idea in the world. If your wallet is not in the position to afford retail therapy trying something as simple as a hot bath, watching your favorite show, or indulging in junk food you wouldn’t normally eat
- FORGIVE. Forgive the other people and forgive yourself. Whatever past mistakes were made, they don’t need to continue to haunt you. You deserve a clean pallet and the ability to redirect your emotions. Even if the other people or person are the ones who did you wrong, keeping the negative emotions is only going to harm you. Sometimes, we have to learn to accept the apologies we are never going to receive.
These steps probably won’t be achieved overnight. Unfortunatley emotional hangovers tend to linger like a bad odor. Sometimes they come in wave; weeks after you think you’ve fully recovered a ong or a memory can flash before you and you feel that horrible sadness all over again. Give yourself time and patience.
With love and positive vibes,